Today's vaguely disturbing piece on the class war between you and people who are better than you comes in the form of this New York Times article: The Guardian of Gramercy Park’s Leafy Seclusion, a portrait of one Arlene Harrison, self-appointed mayor of Gramercy Park. Ms. Harrison appears to be the guardian of all things pretty, quiet, and locked securely behind wrought-iron fences.

[Harrison] has added to a list of regulations (no dogs, no feeding of birds, no groups larger than six people, no Frisbees or soccer balls or “hard balls” of any kind) that, in turn, have served to dictate how the park is — and is not — used. Most recently, she helped pave the way for Zeckendorf Realty to redevelop a 17-story Salvation Army boarding house on the south side of the park, and for the company’s plan to convert the 300 rooms into 14 floor-through apartments plus a penthouse duplex. The company would not confirm the transaction.

Yes, the Salvation Army does tend to attract undesirable elements, such as the poor and the young.

Actual use of the park is not Ms. Harrison’s measure. “It was always an ornamental park,” she said. “A lot of people don’t even go in to enjoy it. They’re so thrilled just to see it. It’s like a hotel room with a view of the ocean.”...

How Marie Antoinette.

There is, to be frank, not much to do in the park. Music is forbidden. So are alcoholic beverages, bicycles and furniture. A gravel path around the perimeter provides the only opportunity for low-impact play, or, for that matter, running or walking. Ms. Harrison said parents constantly offer to donate playground components for the park, but she won’t have it.

“Too much wear and tear,” she said. “But do you know what? The children who grow up here learn to use their imagination.”

Seen but not heard. Welcome to the new city of the gentry.

How chilling.